Still

Still here. Still infertile. Still no treatment plan in sight.

Still nothing new to write about. Still no motivation to think of anything to write about.

Still waiting for that to change.

Ohhh Sneaky Infertility

Why do I assume things won't bother me? Even though I know they are bugging all my other IF friends? Today is a perfect example. All week I told myself that Mother's Day was not going to get me down... why would it? It's not a holiday I put much thought into normally. It's not like I count down the days until it's here. It's not Christmas. I've been working in a kindergarten room the last couple of weeks, and even doing the Mother's Day stuff in there didn't impact me at all. I thought I was totally safe.

Then I woke up this morning and logged into FB. Cue the breakdown. I think what really get's me is just being reminded that my entire group of close friends are now moms. Sometimes more than once. Most of them all in the time we've been trying. It's not so much being left out of the club, it's more just not having a place to belong at all. Feeling so stagnant in my own life, that it seems like I'll never move forward.

The stagnant feeling unfortunately extends way past infertility in my life... but I guess that's another story.

Luckily I think I'll be able to avoid most people today, since I have some work to do at the school I'm working at. I called my own mom, and sent a couple texts, but I'm not doing a status update about a day that doesn't apply to me, and I'm not sending out any kind of mass text to everyone. If the Hubs wants to do it, that's fine. But for me, my goal for today is just get out alive, and start a new week tomorrow.

Hope everyone else out there is getting through the day alright. I cannot wait for my RESOLVE group tomorrow!!