Saturday, July 24, 2010

I Have A Hard Time Waiting.

I admit it. I knew about 20 seconds after we got the call about the grant that we would be back into treatment as soon as possible. Even though the grant doesn't cover everything... even though we should probably wait a bit longer... even though... oh forget it, I'm out of reasons, and tired of waiting!!
We aren't going to start cycling this month, or even next, but maybe within the next three months! AHHHHH!!!! WITHIN THE NEXT THREE MONTHS! Holy cow! I called and made an appointment at the clinic we'll be using now, since we aren't bound by insurance (lucky us... no insurance, lol). We started a new donor search and have even narrowed it down to a few key players with names like The Viking and Roller Gang (lol, naming our donors is our favorite part).
My husband has been in a better mood since he found out about the grant, and the possible start of treatment, although we are both really scared about starting again. I don't think we'll be truly happy until there is a little bundle of joy in our arms. That saddens me a little. I wish we were still blissfully naive about baby making. But, at the same time, I know this whole experience will make us stronger, better parents. And that eventually we'll achieve our goal of bringing home a beautiful little tot... or two, lol.

3 comments:

  1. It sucks that infertility and loss totally strips you of the innocent joy you've always expected/anticipated about pregnancy. In the end though, bundle(s) of joy will outweigh that feeling!

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  2. You will be parents one day soon. You will experience all the joy that comes with it. It will be worth all this crap, that for whatever reason you two are going through. Hang in there and remember how much you are both loved!!! It WILL be worth it. It will be a day we will all celebrate! I promise!

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  3. reading your blogs really puts things in perspective. i'm sorry you guys are having such a hard time but i agree with you. this whole experience is preparing you for the rest of your life and it will make you both incredible parents. your future child(ren) is/are going to be appreciated at every moment. i sure hope that you guys get pregnant! do you have a donation site or anything?

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My Aunt Jane Knows More Than My RE ----- I stole this from C :D

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